Summer is the season when many families change. Seniors graduate from high school and college. Children often marry in the summer months. A job change may require relocation. 

I remember vividly a conversation I had with my mother 26 years ago when our oldest son graduated from high school. If memory serves, Mom and I were standing on the back deck of our home. It was a perfect day! The house was full of family, all celebrating Nathan’s accomplishments. 

Privately, Mom almost whispered in my ear, “When Nathan leaves for the University of Georgia in a couple of months, your family is going to change forever.” Little did I know the depth of wisdom Mom just implanted in my soul. Two years later, Justin graduated, and the following year, Lindsey. Within four years of Nathan’s graduation, he had finished his degree, begun a master’s program, and was married. 

With Nathan’s high school graduation, the five lives in our nest began a season of change that reshaped who we were as individuals and as a family. Today, 26 years later, our nest has grown to include three awesome in-laws and six amazing grandchildren. “Beautiful” best describes all those changes, though not always understood or valued when the change engine was in first gear. 

At any given time in your practice, married or single parents are in the midst of what I call, “empty nest surprises.” Their children have come into their young adult years. Many of them have left home for education, marriage, or work opportunities. And yes, when adults—together or separated—invest the symphony years of their lives rearing, nurturing, and supporting their young, the “what’s next?” question crawls up the blind side of their lives with little or no warning.

Do this going forward. Be cognizant of where your clients are on the empty nest spectrum. When you are with them, ask questions about their children. Be curious in gaining perspectives on what they are doing and what their plans are for the future. Don’t be shy about asking, “How are you handling those changes in their lives?” Give your clients a long runway to talk about feelings, the financial strain of paying for a college education, or the choices their children are making. 

Young adult children leave the nest! Most will eventually marry. And very soon—you have no idea how soon—grandchildren come into the family as God’s wonderful reward for not killing your children! 

And in every season of this unfolding story, you as the advisor have a key role to play. Your clients need your counsel, expertise, and wisdom in their empty nest years more than ever before. Doing the planning and money management components of your work will be demanding. Going with them on that journey, however, will be priceless. Enjoy every moment, discovering again and again the value of this good work.

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